Hear the Cry for Help: Regain Civility to Stop the Violence!

In light of the recent nearly daily reports of unthinkable violent crimes, obviously on the rise in this country, this is surely timely and, hopefully, will inspire change to stop this madness. 

I must admit that, yes, I am a member of the Wakefield Alliance Against Violence (WAAV) and I am even the Media Liaison to various news services for the organization. If that makes me a shameless user of the local media system to make a point, then so be it. I could not be guilty for a better cause.

It is my hope that you, the reader, will become more aware about this epidemic in our society and watch the two music videos. Then, take the next steps:  watch the Civility Project program on WCAT, borrow or buy the Saving Civility book and be inspired to do what you can to help. 

WAAV just hosted a visit from noted author, Sara Hacala, who wrote Saving Civility: 52 Ways to Tame Rude, Crude and Attitude for a Polite Planet, available at the Lucius Beebe Memorial Library, 345 Main Street. She spoke to an audience of community leaders at WCAT studios and, next day, to eighth-graders and their parents at the Galvin Middle School.

The evening program, broadcast live on October 23, will be rebroadcast multiple times over the next few weeks. Check the listings on Wakefield Community Access TV (WCAT) at wcatwakefield.org/ for times or call 781-224-0300. On RCN and Comcast cable networks, WCAT public programming is seen on Channel 3 and on Verizon, it is Channel 40.

WAAV's mission is to raise awareness that violent behavior in any relationship is unacceptable and to offer an alternative by learning civil ways to approach problems with their Civility Project and Got Civility? campaign. 

These videos are a personal addition to the awareness challenge and not part of the WAAV Civility project. I offer them, on my own, because they show the essence of what many live through every day, trying to find a way out. It is hoped these two different scenarios will inspire a desire to help all of us to change even one life for the better and break this vicious cycle.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o0oenkCT8EY

The country video for Because of You, re-made for Reba McEntire's Reba Duets album debut, features two 1930s flapper-era show girls. Clarkson plays the abused victim who during the show has to watch her "insignificant" other flirt with another woman, yet he comes backstage to "claim" her as McEntire, who has empathized with Clarkson, gets to watch Clarkson "choose" to stay with her partner, despite an obvious black eye. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bcDf8C7h_Kg

The original pop video focused on the abuse that Clarkson witnessed and lived through prior to her parent's divorce as she relives the scenes in her childhood with her vision of herself in the video sequences. She realizes that she and her partner are repeating history. It looks like they reconcile at the end, yet the look on both the frightened little girl's face and her own emotionally-charged expression shows the damage has already been done. 

Both videos are sad productions, and neither really end happily. Each video depicts a side of life that so many are living with, feeling trapped and helpless to do anything to stop the abuse or escape from it. There are alternatives, change can happen, there is a way out, but the victims, their enablers, the abusers, all need to change their behavior and learn civility.

The Because Of You Lyrics were written by Kelly Clarkson, at age 16,  about her parent's relationship that ended in divorce. It is obvious what an impact this violent behavior had on her and grips her still. Help her help us help you help them.